Post by Namine Joy LeBeau on Dec 12, 2011 5:43:32 GMT -5
Three days.
Is that's all it been?
Feels like longer.
"Namine, sit up straight... A lady does not slouch," My mother says with out looking up, knowing my tendencies to not follow the dinning rules since I've gone out into the real world. Not that she necessarily follows them either. But this is one of those do as they say, not as they do things. So I sit up, back bone relieved from the weight that had it slightly bent.
"Sorry, ma'am," I say softly and silently cut the steak on my plate. Admittedly I had missed the food we had at our meals, I'm not always the best with a budget, but even when I binge on my schooling supplies I still don't have enough to eat something this amazing every night. Not that its my money anyways... Its theirs.
I hope their still sending Darla something, imagine her having to work a job! I fear for anyone she has to call Boss...
Boss.
No, not now... Not here!
This is not the time and place to get a Neku look!
I look over at my parents at either end of the long table, neither seem to notice my internal struggle to not smile dreamily and ignore my food... GAH! Stop thinking about it!!!
My knife is stabbed a little too hard down and a ringing of metal onto glass is heard. Mother and Father look to me, both with their own expression of confusion.
I bow my head in embarrassment, "Sorry... Steak is tougher than usual tonight."
Father gives an apologetic nod and Mother rolls her green eyes, "Be more careful... That China costs more than you're worth." Nodding I find myself smiling while my face is shadowed. At least she hasn't changed the usual spiel she gives. I could laugh, but I don't feel like getting punished today. So instead I nod.
"Sorry again, Ma'am."
We then continue on in silence.
Our next course comes, a light salad to clean our palates, before we are served our desert. I smile when I see the chocolate and Carmel sundae on a brownie topped with whip cream and seven cherries for good luck. Yum, looks like the cooks still remember me.
One look at my mother shows her disapproval, per usual, of my choice in sweets. Her own fruit salad only lightly sprinkled in sugar and a small bowl of yogurt to the side (vanilla of course), just the way she likes it. My father having a fair sized bowl of hot bandanna pudding. And Mother was angry with me, she's not going to touch him all night long now... Maybe this is my welcoming home gift from my Father... Maybe their having a fight... I hope not... I hate when they fight...
I frown to myself as I dig into my desert.
Somehow dinner always managed to seem lonely since my travels. I've seen how others eat together, they trade family love for food. I would take that any day to be with those people again... To have someone to discuss things with, to not feel...
Don't start that again...
You have six months.
You can brake free of this.
"Your room is ready," Father spoke up as I spoon some of the wonderful substance into my mouth and I look over to him with as smile. He means my old bedroom. It has been going through renovations since I got here and pretty much throw a fit before my mother got home. Throwing glass, ripping pillows, snapping wood.
I was so angry with them.
And I'm sure somewhere Angel was just as upset.
I could feel our anger.
Even though it was mine.
And they say with the right chemicals running through you body you can do just about anything. Well I destroyed my room and then proceeded to cry while locking myself in my personal bathroom. Its a quiet place and I didn't hear my Father come in, he had carried me out and into a guest room where he fixed up any damage I had done to my body.
He never asked why I was upset.
Never spoke a word.
Just acted.
And for once...
With out my mother telling him to.
He then protected me from my Mother's anger when she found out what I had done. This is the first time in a long time I've felt safe in this manor.
A long time.
But then again...
I still hate that room.
My eyes turn to his identical ones, lifeless and in a losing battle with the world, "I would like to stay in the room I am in."
He nods.
Mother holds her tongue.
We're silent again.
I finish my desert.
They do to.
Mother tells me to go and get ready for bed.
I do.
The bath was wonderful, the pj's even better, but most of all the soft bed makes me fall asleep almost instantly.
- - -
Three weeks.
That's how long she's been gone.
Darla has been smug about it at first.
But then...
She wasn't anymore, now she just glare at me every now and again.
She won't tell me to leave.
She won't invite me to stay either.
She knows we're both guests, I know she belongs with Namine.
I do not.
Pain washes over me, like the rage from before when I just had to... Had to do something! But I couldn't, my strength has been sapped from me for a long time. Because of what I did, what I can do, I'm just suppressing myself.
Waiting.
Why hasn't anyone come to end this yet?
Darla and Aqua both.
They said I should like with misery.
Its the pain I deserve for what I've done. To both the people I've loved. Maybe.
Maybe I should just do it myself?
No.
I'm too much of a cowered to do something like that. I blame everyone else for my faults when I know, deep down, its all me that is to blame.
"I just want to die."
Darla looks to me and sighs.
She never responds to me.
I only speak everyone once and while so... I guess that's fine.
She talks at me though.
Tells me all the things I've known all along.
Monster.
Killer.
Abuser.
Demon.
Are just some of the words I get to hear from her.
She never once calls me by the name I once claimed as mine.
I like the new name she has for me.
Its more fitting...
Because...
I really seem to just be an...
Omen.
- - -
Alright guys... That's all I have for now ^^' I really wanted to write something that could possible end up cannon... But isn't yet... *blinks* Is that how I phrase it guys?
Nami: Meh
Ang: ...
Aqua: Um... *shrugs*
Dar: Sure
Sini: You're the boss~
Midori: For the sake I do not want to be like the asshole, sorry mother, from above... Yes, I think that's just right.
Kiara: *puuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*
And don't even think about rearing your ugly head Kiara's NPC Master!
Master: *slinks back to Otherworld*
That's what I thought!
Anywhom.
I hope that was enjoyable... I enjoyed it...
Now I wanna write more Leo~<3 I love writing in his POV unfortunately... I lost an important part of his story... I just gotta hope Miri still has it D:
peace out for now~<3
All: BYE~<3
Is that's all it been?
Feels like longer.
"Namine, sit up straight... A lady does not slouch," My mother says with out looking up, knowing my tendencies to not follow the dinning rules since I've gone out into the real world. Not that she necessarily follows them either. But this is one of those do as they say, not as they do things. So I sit up, back bone relieved from the weight that had it slightly bent.
"Sorry, ma'am," I say softly and silently cut the steak on my plate. Admittedly I had missed the food we had at our meals, I'm not always the best with a budget, but even when I binge on my schooling supplies I still don't have enough to eat something this amazing every night. Not that its my money anyways... Its theirs.
I hope their still sending Darla something, imagine her having to work a job! I fear for anyone she has to call Boss...
Boss.
No, not now... Not here!
This is not the time and place to get a Neku look!
I look over at my parents at either end of the long table, neither seem to notice my internal struggle to not smile dreamily and ignore my food... GAH! Stop thinking about it!!!
My knife is stabbed a little too hard down and a ringing of metal onto glass is heard. Mother and Father look to me, both with their own expression of confusion.
I bow my head in embarrassment, "Sorry... Steak is tougher than usual tonight."
Father gives an apologetic nod and Mother rolls her green eyes, "Be more careful... That China costs more than you're worth." Nodding I find myself smiling while my face is shadowed. At least she hasn't changed the usual spiel she gives. I could laugh, but I don't feel like getting punished today. So instead I nod.
"Sorry again, Ma'am."
We then continue on in silence.
Our next course comes, a light salad to clean our palates, before we are served our desert. I smile when I see the chocolate and Carmel sundae on a brownie topped with whip cream and seven cherries for good luck. Yum, looks like the cooks still remember me.
One look at my mother shows her disapproval, per usual, of my choice in sweets. Her own fruit salad only lightly sprinkled in sugar and a small bowl of yogurt to the side (vanilla of course), just the way she likes it. My father having a fair sized bowl of hot bandanna pudding. And Mother was angry with me, she's not going to touch him all night long now... Maybe this is my welcoming home gift from my Father... Maybe their having a fight... I hope not... I hate when they fight...
I frown to myself as I dig into my desert.
Somehow dinner always managed to seem lonely since my travels. I've seen how others eat together, they trade family love for food. I would take that any day to be with those people again... To have someone to discuss things with, to not feel...
Don't start that again...
You have six months.
You can brake free of this.
"Your room is ready," Father spoke up as I spoon some of the wonderful substance into my mouth and I look over to him with as smile. He means my old bedroom. It has been going through renovations since I got here and pretty much throw a fit before my mother got home. Throwing glass, ripping pillows, snapping wood.
I was so angry with them.
And I'm sure somewhere Angel was just as upset.
I could feel our anger.
Even though it was mine.
And they say with the right chemicals running through you body you can do just about anything. Well I destroyed my room and then proceeded to cry while locking myself in my personal bathroom. Its a quiet place and I didn't hear my Father come in, he had carried me out and into a guest room where he fixed up any damage I had done to my body.
He never asked why I was upset.
Never spoke a word.
Just acted.
And for once...
With out my mother telling him to.
He then protected me from my Mother's anger when she found out what I had done. This is the first time in a long time I've felt safe in this manor.
A long time.
But then again...
I still hate that room.
My eyes turn to his identical ones, lifeless and in a losing battle with the world, "I would like to stay in the room I am in."
He nods.
Mother holds her tongue.
We're silent again.
I finish my desert.
They do to.
Mother tells me to go and get ready for bed.
I do.
The bath was wonderful, the pj's even better, but most of all the soft bed makes me fall asleep almost instantly.
- - -
Three weeks.
That's how long she's been gone.
Darla has been smug about it at first.
But then...
She wasn't anymore, now she just glare at me every now and again.
She won't tell me to leave.
She won't invite me to stay either.
She knows we're both guests, I know she belongs with Namine.
I do not.
Pain washes over me, like the rage from before when I just had to... Had to do something! But I couldn't, my strength has been sapped from me for a long time. Because of what I did, what I can do, I'm just suppressing myself.
Waiting.
Why hasn't anyone come to end this yet?
Darla and Aqua both.
They said I should like with misery.
Its the pain I deserve for what I've done. To both the people I've loved. Maybe.
Maybe I should just do it myself?
No.
I'm too much of a cowered to do something like that. I blame everyone else for my faults when I know, deep down, its all me that is to blame.
"I just want to die."
Darla looks to me and sighs.
She never responds to me.
I only speak everyone once and while so... I guess that's fine.
She talks at me though.
Tells me all the things I've known all along.
Monster.
Killer.
Abuser.
Demon.
Are just some of the words I get to hear from her.
She never once calls me by the name I once claimed as mine.
I like the new name she has for me.
Its more fitting...
Because...
I really seem to just be an...
Omen.
- - -
Alright guys... That's all I have for now ^^' I really wanted to write something that could possible end up cannon... But isn't yet... *blinks* Is that how I phrase it guys?
Nami: Meh
Ang: ...
Aqua: Um... *shrugs*
Dar: Sure
Sini: You're the boss~
Midori: For the sake I do not want to be like the asshole, sorry mother, from above... Yes, I think that's just right.
Kiara: *puuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*
And don't even think about rearing your ugly head Kiara's NPC Master!
Master: *slinks back to Otherworld*
That's what I thought!
Anywhom.
I hope that was enjoyable... I enjoyed it...
Now I wanna write more Leo~<3 I love writing in his POV unfortunately... I lost an important part of his story... I just gotta hope Miri still has it D:
peace out for now~<3
All: BYE~<3
