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Post by Namine Joy LeBeau on Dec 31, 2011 17:31:39 GMT -5
Its not pain I feel this time.
Its the absence of pain.
And this is what I fear the most, no, its not death. Its worse than being numb too. Its worse than being useless, worse than being nothing. No this is just pure darkness and it scares me.
I can hear Aqua and Shiki, oh thank gawd, SHIKI!
I can feel my hand being grabbed, I can even move my fingers to clench it, but the darkness, it won't go away.
Is it because I can't open my eyes, their too tired? Or is it because my mind wants me to be scared to death?
I feel my body twitch at the second one, no, I'm not trying to get myself killed. And I'm not really that tired then why--
I wouldn't dream of telling Shiki everything would I?
Would I?
"............yes.........."
I know I would.
I need to.
I need her to understand.
I really do.
I need to not hate Angel like Aqua does.
Like Neku does.
I need someone to except him like I do.
"......Shi.....Ki?" My eyes crack open. "..... Shiki?"
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Post by Shiki on Dec 31, 2011 17:39:28 GMT -5
When Namine opened her eyes, a small sigh of relief escaped her. She held Namine's hand comfortingly, "I'm right here." Her voice was soft and quiet, and she looked at her friend with, not sympathy, but in a way that showed she was there for her for whatever she needed. "How are you feeling?"
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Post by Namine Joy LeBeau on Dec 31, 2011 17:44:02 GMT -5
"Like I went throw a butcher's shop," I manage after a few tries. I smile and hold her hand a little tighter. "Could be worse... They held back this time." I smile weakly to Shiki and look around with just my eyes.
"Aqua really.... Really left, then?" I frown to myself at that. "Shik... What did she tell you?"
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Post by Shiki on Dec 31, 2011 17:51:39 GMT -5
Shiki cringed, "Wish I could help. Healing isn't where I stand in abilities though." The red head nodded, "Yeah not that long ago." She looked at Namine, and tightened her hold on her hand, "She was...vague about everything. All she said was that she's going to beat Angel's ass...he did this didn't he?" The question didn't come out angry, more as if she was trying to understand.
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Post by Namine Joy LeBeau on Dec 31, 2011 17:55:25 GMT -5
Slowly I nod, "Yeah... But don't be mad at him... It was my fault for provoking him by wanting to run away."
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Post by Shiki on Dec 31, 2011 18:19:25 GMT -5
Don't be mad? Inside she was half angry, but at the moment confusion was more of her first emotion. "You wanted to run away? I..." She sighed and shook her head, "I'm sorry Nami...I really have no idea what's going on...I don't know how to feel about any of this."
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Post by Namine Joy LeBeau on Dec 31, 2011 18:24:06 GMT -5
"Its okay," My voice grows stronger. "And I was just protecting Aqua... Or at least trying to."
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Post by Shiki on Dec 31, 2011 18:33:35 GMT -5
"From Angel? Why would he want to hurt her?" Why would he want to hurt Namine? Shiki stopped, "I shouldn't be asking about this, should I? I mean I am concerned but..." She paused again, then finally figured out what she wanted to say. She held Namine's hand a little tighter, "Namine...I don't want to press you for what you don't want to talk about. But if you do, then I'm here to listen."
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Post by Namine Joy LeBeau on Dec 31, 2011 18:36:24 GMT -5
"Shiki," I smile to my friend. The one person on this Earth I would willingly call my sister.
"She was his first love, she betrayed him," I laugh weakly. "He's never forgave her."
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Post by Shiki on Dec 31, 2011 18:43:00 GMT -5
Shiki stared at her for a moment, "Sorry, that's gonna take a minute to sink in." It was hard for her to imagine Aqua hurting anyone that way. "So he loved her...but it must have ended badly..."
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Post by Namine Joy LeBeau on Dec 31, 2011 18:46:45 GMT -5
"Okay let me tell you this the right way," I take a breath before continuing. "Angel loved Aqua, but it was one sided and by the time he had the guts to tell her it was already too late. She was pregnant and scared. She ran away from his help. This drove him mad, so mad that he did his first ever horrible act.... He killed his best friend... He killed her lover."
I pause to let Shiki take it in, "Let me know when to continue."
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Post by Shiki on Dec 31, 2011 18:51:54 GMT -5
She was quiet, wrapping her head around the whole thing. Something told her it was going to get worse from there. After a minute she nodded, "Go ahead."
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Post by Namine Joy LeBeau on Dec 31, 2011 18:58:27 GMT -5
"Aqua let him go, she's just that.... I don't know, kind?" I smile a moment to myself before frowning. "Now here is where things get sticky between his memories and her retelling..."
I sigh, "Angel had made deal, a way to get rid of his evils, of his guilts... It didn't work... Instead he went after Aqua again and again. Each time getting stronger and more crazed with a possessive love." I shake my head to clear it of Angel's memories of those painful days, the days he watched himself attack her. "He was helpless to his demons, she doesn't know this or maybe she does and she just doesn't care... He's after her children... he wants them dead, wants anything that reminds him of Aqua's lover gone."
I pause again, this time to think, "I think that's why he chose me... I was as far from a demon of darkness and shadows as one can get." Now I let Shiki think about it for a moment.
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Post by Shiki on Dec 31, 2011 19:11:01 GMT -5
She looked at Namine, thinking all of it over. A few minutes went by and she was still quiet. Shiki used her free hand to push back a piece of hair, then spoke, "Honestly...I pity him. He tried to fix it but he couldn't let go...so love poisoned him."
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Post by Namine Joy LeBeau on Dec 31, 2011 19:21:18 GMT -5
Now that surprised me and I smile, "Good now remember that feeling." I move to lean against her despite the pain I'm getting from what's left of my last beating. "He found me when I was much littler, he saved me and my city. He became my guardian Angel... He fell in love... And so did I."
I smile at the warmth of the memories, "He used to treat me so nice, but then again... Maybe he was just barely holding himself back, keeping me safe from himself as well." My head shakes. "My eighteenth birthday rolls around and I tell him no and he snaps... That's what began the abuse. One little word, no... Ever sinc then I've been saying two bigger word, I'm sorry." I let go of Shiki's hand and bring mine together in order to make them stop their sudden shakiness.
"I'm sorry," I whisper. "That's all I know... That and fear... He scares me, not Angel himself... But the demon that sleeps in him, waiting for Ang to lose himself again and to take what it rightfully owns... Me..."
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